The One About The Women
Say what you will about the Barbie movie.
It’s a clever way to pink-wash feminism.
It’s the most ingenious way to sell products ever.
It’s Woke Femi-nazis at their worst.
It’s hilarious, fun, and (kinda) harmless.
It contains the Best Monologue About Being a Woman in Today’s World Ever (this is not up for argument).
It’s got the most disturbing opening scenes ever.
It confuses placating with equality.
Whatever.
I loved it but found myself wincing at a few points, one of which being Barbie’s endless apologizing (if the Barbies are In Charge, apologizing so much should be outlawed). I think Ryan Gosling deserves All of the Awards for being Ken on the Beach, and later Asshole Bro Ken who comes to his senses when he realizes Barbie is not the enemy. No lie, his portrayal of Toxic Ken is terrifying. I’ve read several articles from women who say that it’s painfully spot on for them in a way that made the movie impossible for them to enjoy. In short, it’s got a lot going on, messaging-wise, so much so that some of it doesn’t quite ring true.
But it’s all wrapped up in a big old Pink Bow of Genius Marketing that I have nothing but 100% respect for.
It said a lot to me about how Barbie (representing “women and girls”) should be able to NOT kiss Ken or love him back or bring him brewski beers (❤️) if she doesn’t want to. Saying “You can go now” to him when he wanted to kiss her and go to her Dream House for a (no doubt confusing) sleep over and having him just go was a statement about bodily agency that I found refreshing.
Sneaking in a mini box of wine and a straw for a grown up juice box experience was also part of the fun for me, I’ll admit. But I’ll also admit that I want to see it again, if for no other reason to check if I still wince at Barbie apology-core and at her for telling Ken that he can be a cool guy with his own autonomy and not be a misogynistic dickhead—something about the extremes of those 2 things felt too forced. But one can only make so many jokes about “Beaching off” I guess, even if there are a lot of levels of between-ness between Ken and Alan that make up the bulk of the dude population.
It was sorta poignant that we went to see this movie (we being me and Mr. Liz whose only negative comment was: “Well, they could have had at least one man on the Barbie Supreme Court” Bless him he is a keeper) the afternoon after an early morning spent white knuckling the couch arm over a soccer match. I have a lot of thoughts about why the USWNT lost in the knock-out round, one of which includes sloppy/inconsistent officiating. The U.S. women definitely rallied after previous uninspiring matches, and had so damn many shots on goal it was painful to watch Sweden’s goalkeeper getting better and better at anticipating them. And ending a match like that with PK’s always makes me queasy-mad.
At the end of all the minutes played, I felt terrible for Megan Rapinoe who maybe should not have played but whatever. It also gave me realize how cool and also scary it is that plenty of other countries have leveled up their women’s game to the point that the playing pitch is almost level, Jamaica aside (ugh.) But I also had to reflect on my own experience raising a female soccer player who made it as far as starting for a Division 1 team. That is to say, I reflected on how damn expensive it was to get her there.
Not that I’m taking credit for the hard work she did. Because it was hard work, no doubt about it. But as I watched the women’s national team—some of the absolute top athletes in the world—console each other after a run of bad luck (injured players) and bad decisions (subs and one might say complacency), I realized that every single one of them represented thousands upon thousands of actual dollars spent to be where they were, staring down the barrel of an ignominious loss. Starting from their initial investment in the Mega Elite Women’s Club Du Jour United** when they were small, through club switches, motels, hotels, gas, airlines, uniforms, camps and more to put them in front of the most college coaches/recruiters humanly possible.
We spent three years in a row in Orlando, Florida between Christmas and New Year’s aka The Most Expensive Possible Period of Days to Be There, to do that very thing. Getting there, entertaining the rest of the family, eating, drinking, sleeping, was, in a word, exorbitant but we got her seen and she played on ESPN’s fancy complex of fields, and yes, it was fun (at least the first 2 years). And she achieved her goal. See: She did the work. I’m not taking that credit.
However, I have to wonder about families who have aspiring young ladies who also happen to be talented, hard working, and as full of dreams and goals as my soccer player who can’t even begin to imagine paying for all that crap. How do their future stars get seen? It’s not at high school games. Not anymore. No self respecting coach or pro scout would darken the door of a lowly public school stadium, or private school for that matter. They are too busy supporting the sports industrial complex known as US Soccer and its attendant football clubs, only showing up for super elite (read: expensive) tournaments in (expensive) resort cities at expensive times of the year. The ruination of high school athletics other than football is rampant and disheartening, and it’s all down to the monetization of kid sports. A monetization that creates an even bigger yawning gulf of opportunity between those who can and those who cannot pay for it.
It’s apparently taking a toll on actual numbers. Participation in youth soccer is down for both men and women, more so for women. It’s too damn expensive and something needs to change, other than offering the occasional scholarship to the odd, outstanding unicorn player. Leave it to us to take the sport that only takes a ball, something to hit it into, and a decently level playing field to participate in and turn it into a Dickensian nightmare of greedy clubs, placating coaches, screaming parents, and tournaments in Orlando…during Christmas.
**If you don’t want to read the whole thing, read this:
“But the (U.S. Soccer) federation can direct more grant money to grassroots programs. It can make education for coaches more affordable – moving up from the lowest levels to the C, B and A levels costs several thousand dollars on top of whatever travel plans a coach must make. It can provide more support for referees in an effort to stop them leaving the game because of abuse by belligerent coaches and parents who scream at officials at nearly every game. It can expand talent identification programs, going out to underserved areas to try to find players who haven’t forked over their parents’ life savings to play for Local Elite Premier Cashcow FC .”
(steps away from the mic, puts away the soapbox and smiles without berating anyone for dissing the team.)
Audio books you should try:
Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow.
Story: 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻+
Narration: 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
Ending: 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
I don’t game, nor did I understand a fair bit of the content about gaming but this is a fabulous story about friendships, love, business partnerships and how to be a woman in a man’s world of gaming. Plus it’s got a great love story!
I gave this one a go mainly to see what the fuss was about and it was a DNF ( = Zero Thumbs Up) for me. Please don’t take me for someone insensitive to the fact that people are in abusive relationships all of the time, don’t realize that they’re in them, and they make seemingly crazy to use decisions to stay there or somehow honor them even after they escape. It’s the writing for me, as in, it is not for me. Also, when you write books that romanticize* abuse—as we say in the midwest. Yeah. No. But you do you. And she’s laughing all the way to the bank so more power to her! Seriously. I respect that.
*I have written books and will continue to read books that contain abuse. But I refuse to make the person doing the abusing any kind of a hero or heroine. I prefer that the person abused who escapes BECOMES a heroine (or a hero).
I’m still listening to Chuck Wendig’s the Wanderers. It’s a chilling commentary on modern society and a super cool contagion story too. More soon…
Next up in my queue are these 2 that I’m super stoked about:
So wish me luck as I narrow in on the final 1/3 of my current WIP, a book I’m calling Range Anxiety and pitching as:
Sideways with women and beer with a dash of Wine Country (but beer) that has me renting electric cars to see how they actually work on a road trip.
cheers,
Liz