The One About the Lists

Also "Birthday Week" means "Espresso Martinis"

I’m a big fan of List Making. It’s always been my go-to when I’m feeling overwhelmed, or even just whelmed and needing to make the dreaded grocery run. I’m useless without them, basically. I can even gauge where I am with my usual cycle of spiraling into imposter syndrome based on how consistently I keep a list with me—i.e. several on me at all times, or I’m raw-dogging the outside world without a single one, which usually ends with me standing in the middle of Harris Teeter /Publix /REI / wherever silently crying, while people skirt politely around me.

My kids can confirm this. During college, post-grad, or early adulting adjustments I advise: “feeling out of control? Make a list. Check things off. Feel accomplished even if you write something down you ALREADY DID for the pure dopamine rush of putting a tick mark by it. Nothing wrong with that.” Since they are officially launched into the world as Adults I’m not sure if this had any impact, until I get screen shots of lists made that at least one of them (the engineer one, natch) will send me.

That said, I don’t typically make a list of resolutions for new year behavior. I’ve even bragged about this at least twice on some internet platform or another so it can be proven since Internet = Forever. I’m not sure how to explain this, really other than as a pseudo-libertarian, up-yours to all the “New year new me” requirements. Silly, really. And I’m remedying that this year.

A lot of it is because of some medical reality checks I’ve received in the last couple of years. I really do want to be the healthiest 60-year-old at the gym in a couple of years, but because of a general lack of metabolism (at least compared to a more youthful me) and a less-general lack of motivation in 2024, I know that it’s going to take extra effort. Some more of it is because of **** flails around like Kermit**** you know, how Things Are Right Now.

I won’t bore you with the details since we need to get onto more pressing matters, like How the Espresso Martini was invented, but I will say that lists are involved, as are apps, books, and a recommitment to writing—something that’s been slipping away from me in the last few years, leaving me as a doom-scrolling, Instagram reel watching (I am adult, I watch Tiktok videos that way), NYT game addicted shell of my former self.

I will say that they are specific goals within goals, and (mostly) achievable, with a bit of dedication. I have deadlines for some — specifically involving wearing a kick-ass mother of the bride dress in May of 2026. Dreams for others. The one about “winning the Mega Millions and buying TikTok so I can find new readers” seems far fetched but I wanted to toss in something silly and yet not terribly off the chain when it comes to “book promotion ideas.”

I will also say that I’m going to stop scrolling and resume reading. Reading books was one thing that brought me joy as a kid and awkwardly intro-extroverted teenager. It got me through college too, since my degree was based on it. I read and read and read all the way up to a certain moment when I became cognizant of myself as “author,” at which time it became somehow not fun anymore. I still consume books in audio form, which I firmly believe is reading. But I find myself (again) scrolling during breaks in my day when I could pick up something off this leaning tower of TBR and rediscover that joy.

Enough. I told you I wouldn’t bore you and here I go…boring you. So bear with me as I smoothly segue by saying another thing on my list for 2025 is a recommitment to alcohol. Not so much as a consumer but as a learner and educator, vis a vis my humble little substack here. I want to know more about the sober lifestyle but also about these thc infused liquids. Do they work? Are they better than gummies or what? So you can look for that in the coming months.

For now, however, let’s chat a little about one of the drinks that I put up there with Red Bull and vodka….the espresso martini.

Well made ones go down smoothly. They do the job of keeping you caffeinated while making you tipsy. Why do this? Who thought of this nonsense? Let’s dig in.

But first, lets see what AI has to say, shall we? I only include this because Gemini’s (I think that’s its name not sure, don’t care) intro on this topic is truly epic. Ahem.

“The Espresso Martini is a cocktail with a rich history that began in the 1980s.”

I mean, if that doesn’t say everything we need to know about AI, I don’t know what does.

It was, in fact, invented in the 80’s, most likely in 1983. Urban legend is that some model or another wanted something to liven her up while getting her turnt all at once. Since Red Bull had not yet been invented, the friendly and helpful bartender at Soho Brassierie in London concocted the first one. Said friendly mixologist was Dick Bradsell, a well known guy in the London bar scene who was party responsible for the disruption of English pub culture. He pulled a shot of espresso from the bar’s fancy new machine, shook up some vodka, coffee liqueur, and sugar water and some ice, then decided to serve it in a martini glass.

A drink legend is born, with an instant “rich history” I guess.

This Bradsell guy supposedly crafted it on the spot. Others say he’d been working on something like it for a while since that was his job and he was London-level famous at it. When he passed away in 2016, there was a huge revival of the drink, and now the damn things are everywhere. After I “experienced” my own stimulant/alcohol mixed drink What-Happens-There-Stays-There moment in Vegas with the aforementioned Red Bull (nothing like that hangover and I’ve Had Some Hangovers, let me assure you), I was loathe to try anything that mixed those two things ever again.

BUT…try it I did, once. And then again, and…as yet another Life Lesson was learned, Espresso Martinis are no different from Regular Martinis…One is not enough, three is too many.

See also: Boobs.

Suffice it to say, I paid for it. BUT I liked the taste of them way better than the Red Bull Vodka Horrors I over-consumed.

Anyways, as long as you have access to good espresso you can make one at home, thusly:

Vodka: 1 ½ oz. for the perfect ratio of booze to coffee.

Coffee liqueur: 1 oz. Kahlúa preferably but there are other options.

Espresso: 1 oz. or 1 shot, chilled. Freshly pulled is best. You can substitute a cold coffee concentrate but honestly…why would you? You could also run to your local Starbies or indie coffee joint and get one or two or however many you need for this.

Simple Syrup: 1/2 oz. We’ve been here before, kids. Make your own. It’s better and way…well, simple. The sweet balances the coffee. Don’t skip this ingredient, trust me.

Espresso powder, coffee beans, chocolate covered espresso beans etc. for garnish.

Combine everything but the garnish stuff in a good cocktail shaker that is halfway filled with ice. Mr. Liz just got me this one and I love it. Shake vigorously and long enough to chill the outside of the shaker and create foam inside. Using 2 glasses, ending with your serving glass, double strain the ingredients. Garnish at will.

I will say, they are fun. But beware having more than 2. They are pure booze!

Here’s a link to some fun things you can do with the basic recipe to make it more fun.

I am told this place is the best one in Greenville to get one so I plan to do just that this weekend between birthday and Christmas. I also have to shout out an amaze-balls dinner we had at Mr. Crisp here in Greenville. We plan to head there on the 24th for some early evening fresh oysters and champagne. 5 Stars. Highly recommend.

Have a great final lead up to the Xmas Holiday! And Happy Birthday to ME!

xoxo

Liz

p.s. My domestic thriller Cul-de-Sac is ONLY .99 in ebook form at all ebook retailers. Click here to get yours. It would make an excellent companion for one of those espresso martinis on a cold holiday night.

p.p.s. I’m releasing a timely medical/ reproductive rights/ near future thriller in summer 2025. Click HERE to be on the Super Fan Team which will get you all sorts of things including an early read + swag + a chance to help me choose cover art.